Saturday, January 31, 2026

Less Than Zero

This is the weekly dispatch from Bizarro Studios North, where I have been writing and drawing the Monday through Saturday Bizarro comics since 2018. My partner and friend, Dan Piraro, created Bizarro in the late twentieth century and continues to do the Sunday comic from Rancho Bizarro in Mexico.

Wayno 



Greetings from the frozen mid-Atlantic region. Our predicted low temperature for tonight is minus ten degrees. Still, we're shovelled out and managing well compared to other areas hit by the winter blast.

The snow probably won't fully melt until March, but fingers are crossed for good news from Punxsutawney next week.

I hope you're all warm and safe.


Today's dapper pipe pic is believed to be an early self-portrait of the pioneering photojournalist Charles "Teenie" Harris (1908-1998)

© Teenie Harris Archive, Carnegie Museum of Art, Pittsburgh.
Heinz Family Fund

Harris chronicled life in Pittsburgh's African American community, photographing newsworthy events, sports, political and entertainment figures, and ordinary citizens, for the Pittsburgh Courier. Over the course of his career, he shot more than 80,000 photos, and his archives are now housed in the Carnegie Museum of Art here in Pittsburgh.

In the 1980s and 90s, Mr. Harris licensed his work to a vendor who made prints and sold them at street fairs. During that time, we were fortunate to acquire several of Teenie's photos, which we still display in our home. Here are a few favorites:




The prints we own aren't museum-quality, but we're grateful to have them, and are especially proud that the Carnegie Museum of Art has preserved the legacy of this important man.


We now present some less-than-historic images, in the form of this week's Bizarro comics.

Not everyone observes Dry January.

I have heard from several people whose doctors gave them similar advice.

Perhaps predictably, one Instagram commenter/bot left multiple lengthy diatribes unrelated to the comic. They hit the threshold for being blocked.

That's not a smartphone, but a tiny picket sign.


I must tip my lid to my good friend Vince Dorse. I mentioned to Vince that someone had sent me a joke about Fats Waller and suggested using it as a Bizarro gag. We laughed about the fact that nobody younger than us would even know of Fats Waller. Vince remarked that if it became a comic, "There will be teenagers outside your house, all holding up phones with photos of pitchforks and torches on them."


That clever remark was the seed of this gag. Vince, I owe you lunch!


A roof is optional.

One has to feel sorry for this guy. As far as we know, this isn't yet listed in the DSM.


Nobody likes the coach's pet.


Bonus Track

Fats Waller: "Your Feet's Too Big"

For the kids.


     

24 comments:

  1. Michael Johnson1:10 PM

    It took me a minute or two to figure out the mice at the realty. Nice.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Thank you for that, Michael! When someone says it took them a beat to get the joke, it does my heart good.

      Delete
  2. Dave Molter1:13 PM

    Oh, man, that throwback Republican billboard is just perfect -- proof that the current admin is trying to set us back 77 years. Reminds me of the "Protect the Homeland" posters ICE is using.

    Surfin' JC is just great!

    ReplyDelete
  3. Anonymous1:27 PM

    I had to repost the Teenie Harris billboard photo. All these years later, our perception of what "Vote Republican" might mean has altered considerably.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I think their message has remained consistent over the years.

      Delete
    2. Anonymous9:10 AM

      Agree

      Delete
  4. Doc Atomic1:51 PM

    Long-time Fat Waller fan here. Of course, I am three thousand, four hundred and seventy-two years old.

    Enjoyed the Teenie harris pics and info, too.

    Happy snow daze, Wayno.

    ReplyDelete
  5. Anonymous3:12 PM

    I love Lucky Thompson; just one of a zillion unknown an unappreciated musicians!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Yes, he was a good player! He's unjustly forgotten.

      Delete
  6. Hog maw (pig stomach) is a lot more expensive these days. I'm in Lancaster County and love a good stuffed pig stomach.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I've never had that, and I didn't know that "maw" meant "stomach" in this context. Thanks!!!

      Delete
  7. Man, I love those photos you bought!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. We have about 30 displayed, and still have more in a box. We need to rotate them!

      Delete
  8. Love those photos! But, but... what was the Fast Waller joke about??

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I've forgotten and can't find the message! I remember it not being a bad joke, just a little too obscure in modern times.

      Delete
  9. Anonymous11:11 AM

    Today's Sunday comics was fantastic. And plus, fits me perfectly as a "retired" gymnast.
    And the cat & dog date - LOL
    Thank you for your humor and cheer!

    ReplyDelete
  10. Anonymous2:48 PM

    Fats Waller I know extensively, Teenie Harris was a spectacular revelation. Thank you.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Glad to introduce you to Teenie Harris's work. It's a treasure. Here's another one I love:

      https://collection.carnegieart.org/objects/e1421379-a893-4d4a-b8e6-260d6293b9b1

      Delete
  11. Therese W12:50 AM

    So cool to hear Fats Waller.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Fats was one of the greats!

      Delete
    2. Anonymous9:16 AM

      Fats has always given me a smile - but this one’s especially a delight, and my first time hearing it!

      Delete
    3. Happy to share it! He was delightful.

      Delete