Saturday, December 17, 2022

What the Dickens

This is the weekly dispatch from Bizarro Studios North, where I have been writing and drawing the Monday through Saturday Bizarro comics since 2018. My partner and friend, Dan Piraro, who created Bizarro in the late twentieth century, continues to do the Sunday comic from Rancho Bizarro in Mexico.


Art is rearranging and grouping mistakes.
Don Van Vliet

The end of the year is approaching, and we're scrambling to stay ahead of our publishing deadlines while juggling seasonal activities. I'm currently writing and drawing Bizarro comics for the first few days of February 2023, so in my studio the holidays are already over.

Nonetheless, I'm feeling rather festive after my band played our annual holiday show last weekend. We'd missed it for a couple of years due to the pandemic. This year, we tried out a new location, a local art gallery that also hosts live performances, and it was exhilarating to be among people sharing music, conversation, food and drink.

The quote from Don Van Vliet (Captain Beefheart) is a fairly accurate description of a significant portion of my working process. If art is made from mistakes, I produce plenty of raw material with ink and paper, followed by rearranging, grouping, deleting and redrawing it in the digital realm.

Before I share the results of this week's rearranged mistakes, here's a pipe pic of the prolific humorist P. G. Wodehouse (1881-1975).

Dewey Saunders/Gawker; Getty Images

Thanks to Ian, a blog reader who directed us to this delightful image.

Now, let's take a look at the week in Bizarro.

This one simply had to run on Monday, Bloody Punday. 

Counseling can help a person articulate what they really want in a relationship.


The signage was designed by the mall architect's annoying younger sibling.

I had to move some of the Secret Symbols around for the strip layout, and was able to show the window of the most popular store in the galleria.


We held off as long as we could, and decided it was time for a Christmas gag.

Of course, that might just be a cover story to explain his out of control nose hairs.


We end with an reminder of the limits of cosmetic dentistry.

Well, that wraps up another week of graphic shenanigans from Bizarro Studios North. As always, I thank you for stopping by, and for your readership and support of Bizarro.

Perhaps you'd care to explore our other internet outposts:

Dan Piraro's Bizarro Blog
Check out Dan's latest Sunday Bizarro page, and discover what's occupying his mind of late

Wayno's Bizarro Newsletter
Additional musings, a peek at an upcoming gag, and a graphic item from my historical archives

Dan Piraro's award-winning graphic novel

Holiday Bonus Track

The Red Beans & Rice Combo
"Christmas Island"
Dave Klug: Drums and percussion
Tom Roberts: Piano, whistling and kazoo
Wayno: Vocals and ukulele
Produced by Xayne Berlinski, November 2022

Copyright© 2022 by Wayno®




  1. Love "Christmas Island"! I keep my ears open for new or forgotten Christmas songs. The Old 97's wroth one for The Guardians of the Galaxy Christmas Special called "I Don't Know What Christmas Is, But Christmas Time Is Here". It's sung by an alien who has never actually been to Earth. Loved "Sizigia" but it feels like the mix is off. The drums seem to overpower the Vibraphone. Just my 2¢.

    1. Thanks, Kurt!

      If that take of "Sizigia," was live in the studio, maybe there was some bleed from the drums into other tracks? I need to listen to the video more closely and try to compare it to the CD.

      Thanks for the kind words about "Christmas Island." I believe the first recording of it was by Bing Crosby with the Andrews Sisters. Our piano player, Tom Roberts, toured and recorded with Leon Redbone for many years, and used to play that song. Our arrangement is more like Redbone's than Bing's.

  2. Anonymous3:16 PM

    Oh so delightful! I wonder if the naughty child-based coal works as carbon capture?

  3. Anonymous3:40 PM

    LOVE THAT SONG !!!! Thank you (heart heart)

  4. Michael Johnson3:52 PM

    I'll bet you guys could do a good job on "Slow Boat to China."

    1. Love that tune. The jazzy chord changes might be a little beyond my ukulele chops, at least while also singing!

  5. Nice try on the check drawings! I can see why the person cashed the $80 check but the $7 one seems reasonable! Of course, when we wrote checks, $7 was worth a lot more!
    Loved Christmas Island!
    Cartoons were great, too! My favorite was Info Kiosk at the Pedantic Galleria.

    1. Thanks, Carol. Glad you liked the kiosk gag. That was one of my favorites of the week, too.

  6. I am a tuba player, and in my opinion your illustration of the tuba is excellent.

    1. Thanks! I'm glad I didn't accidentally draw a sousaphone.

  7. tim-in-nj8:46 AM

    On the 'Kiosk' strip, I would have swapped the secret symbols of Pie and Dynamite, as that would have implied a pickle pie, at least in my mind.

    1. Pickle Pie! I hadn't thought of that.

  8. Anonymous10:21 PM

    I can’t find them now, but over the top of the check comics, someone attempted to write “She’s going bald” or something like that in Japanese (actually English written in katakana). Who is this “she” and what is the reference?

    1. Hmmm. That's an old scan, and I don't know exactly where those checks are right now. I'm wondering if it's a reference to the Professor Longhair song "Bald Head."

      The lyrics start with "Looka there, she ain't got no hair. (BALD HEAD!)

      It's a mystery for now.

  9. Anonymous2:19 AM

    Where are you Hanukkah cartoons?